it don’t break even.

there are some things in life which cannot be explained. as much as i want to lay them in words, i can’t because after all they have been broken inside.
you know when people say when one obstacle comes, they usually come in two or more and they all stay for some time, and for that i believed so.
the problem with me is that i have been too involved in certain things that i forgot to take notice of the reality that is happening. it can be scary and it’s something i have never thought about it until last night.

sometimes i wish this is just a nightmare where i can just wake up, feel like shit a bit then be okay afterwards. but i think this ‘reality’ has hit me so hard that i am still not flaring up, still trying to control my emotions. i don’t know why i am doing this and i know it may not be a good choice for me but i think this is the best solution so far.

i just need to rant here. i don’t want to talk to anyone.
i’m going to be okay. i just need time.